Kate Krader (@kkrader on Twitter) is Food & Wine's restaurant editor. When she tells us where to find our culinary heart's desire, we listen up.
Q: What do health enthusiasts have in common with anyone who’s got a really bad hangover?
A: Breakfast as your key meal.
True, diet breakfast might not always resemble the one that you go for after a night of bad decisions with the Long Island Iced Tea three-for-one special. This list is geared for those in need of hot fat and starch in extra-large quantities. But here’s good news if you live in both worlds: in her book, "The Big Breakfast Diet: Eat Big Before 9 A.M. and Lose Big For Life," Dr. Daniela Jakubowicz says, "You can have all the foods you crave, from pasta to bacon to ice cream, with just one catch - you have to eat them before 9:00 A.M."
Now, good luck getting yourself out of bed in time to find these breakfasts.
Hang Over Easy - Columbus, Ohio
I think its worth getting really wasted in Columbus just to appreciate what they do at this restaurant, helpfully located on the Ohio State campus. The Ultimate Hangover Cure is three eggs, three pancakes or French toast slices, two meats (bacon, ham or sausage), hoe fries (not a typo), plus toast. For an extra $1.50 you get chocolate chips; for $2 you can add fresh fruit, if that makes you feel better about yourself. No surprise, they serve breakfast all day.
Pine State Biscuits - Portland, Oregon
We’ve already celebrated Pine State for their excellent use of fried chicken in a biscuit sandwich. That doesn’t mean we can call it out again, as a breakfast commodity. You decide whether you’d order The Wedgie (fried chicken, fried green tomato, a wedge of iceberg and blue cheese dressing on a biscuit), the Reggie Deluxe (their classic Reggie—fried chicken, bacon & cheese topped with gravy, on a biscuit—with an add-on fried egg), or the Pine State Fried Club (three fried grit cakes, one topped with fried chicken and honey, one with pimento cheese and fried green tomato, and one with country ham and cheddar).
The Hungry Hossee - Corby, England
Just in case you think they don’t take hangover-curing breakfasts seriously in the UK, this café in Northamptonshire serves a dish modestly called The Big One. Here’s what you get: "three sausages, three beef burgers, three fried eggs, three rashers of bacon, three slices of black pudding, three square sausages, three portions of beans and three portions of mushrooms. On the side are three potato waffles, three potato scones, three hash browns, three portions of fried bread, three rounds of bread and butter and three rounds of toast." The dish weighs about 6.6 pounds and clocks in at 7500 calories. In October, a customer finished it in 13 minutes and set a record (woo hoo!). Here's hoping it was before 9 am.
The Broken Yolk Café - San Diego, California
This is home to the Broken Yolk Iron Man Challenge – a dozen-egg omelet with mushrooms, onions, American cheese, chili and cheese, served with home fries and two biscuits. If you can eat it in one hour, it's free, which is why I’m paging the Hungry Hossee record breaker right now.
Shelby's Kitchen and Deli - Deerfield Beach, Florida
Some places just like to offer crazy breakfast challenges to anyone who wants to eat themselves sick. The Terminator challenge is a 24-inch pancake, four fried eggs, six pork sausages, one pound of bacon, two pounds of home fries and two slices of toast. If you by yourself can eat that whole thing between opening and closing hours (your best bet is Sunday, when it's open from 7 to 7), you get your $19.99 back. It has reportedly only been done once, in May 2011, in over 400 attempts. Where is that Hungry Hossee guy?
Hash House A Go Go, Las Vegas, plus Reno and San Diego
The Indiana Favorites section of the menu is where it's at. There you’ll find Andy's Sage Fried Chicken Benedict (fried chicken, maple reduction, two eggs, bacon mashed potatoes and biscuit), Griddled Meatloaf (which comes with two eggs, mashed potatoes, fruit and a biscuit), or, for those who are already missing their alcohol first thing in the A.M., the O'Hare of the Dog: just a 24-oz Budweiser in a bag with a side of bacon.
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